Sailors Knots | Page 3

'e wasn't a real Zulu, because the manager said
they'd tear 'im to pieces if they did, and eat 'im arterwards, but arter a
time 'is nervousness wore off and he jumped about like a monkey.
They gave performances every arf hour from ha'-past six to ten, and
Rupert felt ready to drop. His feet was sore with dancing and his throat
ached with singing Zulu, but wot upset 'im more than anything was an
elderly old party wot would keep jabbing 'im in the ribs with her
umbrella to see whether he could laugh.
[Illustration: An elderly old party wot would keep jabbing 'im in the
ribs with her umbrella.]
They 'ad supper arter they 'ad closed, and then Mr. Alfredi and 'is wife
went off, and Rupert and George made up beds for themselves in the
shop, while Kumbo 'ad a little place to herself at the back.
He did better than ever next night, and they all said he was improving

fast; and Mr. Alfredi told 'im in a whisper that he thought he was better
at it than Kumbo. "Not that I should mind 'er knowing much," he ses,
"seeing that she's took such a fancy to you."
"Ah, I was going to speak to you about that," ses Rupert. "Forwardness
is no name for it; if she don't keep 'erself to 'erself, I shall chuck the
whole thing up."
The manager coughed behind his 'and. "And go back to the Army?" he
ses. "Well, I should be sorry to lose you, but I won't stand in your way."
Mrs. Alfredi, wot was standing by, stuffed her pocket-'ankercher in 'er
mouth, and Rupert began to feel a bit uneasy in his mind.
"If I did," he ses, "you'd get into trouble for 'elping me to desert."
"Desert!" ses Mr. Alfredi. "I don't know anything about your
deserting."
"Ho!" ses Rupert. "And wot about my uniform?"
"Uniform?" ses Mr. Alfredi. "Wot uniform? I ain't seen no uniform.
Where is it?"
Rupert didn't answer 'im, but arter they 'ad gone 'ome he told George
that he 'ad 'ad enough of acting and he should go.
"Where to?" ses George.
"I'll find somewhere," ses Rupert. "I sha'n't starve."
"You might ketch your death o' cold, though," ses George.
Rupert said he didn't mind, and then he shut 'is eyes and pretended to
be asleep. His idea was to wait till George was asleep and then pinch 'is
clothes; consequently 'is feelings when 'e opened one eye and saw
George getting into bed with 'is clothes on won't bear thinking about.
He laid awake for hours, and three times that night George, who was a
very heavy sleeper, woke up and found Rupert busy tucking him in.

By the end of the week Rupert was getting desperate. He hated being
black for one thing, and the more he washed the better color he looked.
He didn't mind the black for out o' doors, in case the Army was looking
for 'im, but 'aving no clothes he couldn't get out o' doors; and when he
said he wouldn't perform unless he got some, Mr. Alfredi dropped 'ints
about having 'im took up for a deserter.
"I've 'ad my suspicions of it for some days," he ses, with a wink,
"though you did come to me in a nice serge suit and tell me you was an
actor. Now, you be a good boy for another week and I'll advance you a
couple o' pounds to get some clothes with."
Rupert asked him to let 'im have it then, but 'e wouldn't, and for another
week he 'ad to pretend 'e was a Zulu of an evening, and try and
persuade Kumbo that he was an English gentleman of a daytime.
He got the money at the end of the week and 'ad to sign a paper to give
a month's notice any time he wanted to leave, but he didn't mind that at
all, being determined the fust time he got outside the place to run away
and ship as a nigger cook if 'e couldn't get the black off.
He made a list o' things out for George to get for 'im, but there seemed
to be such a lot for two pounds that Mr. Alfredi shook his 'ead over it;
and arter calling 'imself a soft-'arted fool, and saying he'd finish up in
the workhouse, he made it three pounds and told George to look sharp.
"He's a very good marketer," he ses, arter George 'ad gone; "he don't
mind wot trouble he takes. He'll very likely haggle for hours to get
sixpence knocked off the trousers or twopence off the shirt."
It was twelve o'clock in the morning when George went, and at ha'-past
four Rupert turned nasty, and said