The Tale of Major Monkey | Page 9

ranks!" he shouted as fiercely as he knew how.
The generals stopped tittering at once. For a minute or two everybody marched on in silence. And then the cry, "Halt!" rang suddenly out.
The generals all stopped. Major Monkey stopped, too. And his face seemed more wrinkled than ever as he looked every general in the face.
Naturally, that took some time, for there were several dozens of them.
"Who shouted 'Halt?'" the Major asked at last.
But nobody knew. At least, nobody answered. And there was a good deal of low talking and craning of necks. For some reason or other, everybody peered at Peter Mink. But he stared straight ahead in the most innocent fashion.
Major Monkey said nothing more. But he walked behind the army and picked up a stick.
"Forward, march!" he commanded then. And as the army moved on, he continued to walk in the rear, just behind old Mr. Crow.
Soon the cry, "Halt!" sounded again. And as soon as he heard it, Major Monkey threw his stick with great force and caught Peter Mink neatly in the back of his head. Peter Mink toppled over where he stood.
"There!" Major Monkey remarked. "He won't bother us any more to-day." And before the army had stopped gasping, he marched it forward again, leaving Peter Mink stretched upon the ground.
Some of the generals objected, and said that they thought that Peter Mink ought to be looked after.
But Major Monkey told them that they were in the army, and that it was war, and they must expect even worse things to happen.
Now, Jimmy Rabbit was a tender-hearted chap. He couldn't bear the thought of leaving even a rascal like Peter Mink wounded and alone.
"I think you ought to send the cook back to take care of him," Jimmy told Major Monkey.
At that, Mr. Crow--who was the cook--spoke up and said that he was going to stay with the army.
"I don't see," he said, "how you could get along without me. An army without a cook is as good as lost."
Major Monkey promptly agreed with Mr. Crow.
"Certainly we mustn't get lost," he said. "If we were lost, the enemy never could find us. And we might wander about in the woods for years and years."
His remarks made some of the generals a bit uneasy. And one of them--a soldier called Billy Woodchuck--announced that he would have to be leaving.

XII
Over and Under
When Billy Woodchuck talked about leaving the army, Major Monkey became greatly excited. He muttered something under his breath about deserters, and shooting them at sunrise. And he strutted up to Billy Woodchuck and asked him what he meant by quitting the army without permission.
Though Billy Woodchuck hung his head, he insisted that he must go home.
"I have an engagement," he explained, "to stand guard in the clover-patch, while my father and some other old gentlemen feast on clover-tops."
"Are they expecting an attack?" Major Monkey inquired, pricking up his ears.
"Of course not!" said Billy Woodchuck. "They're not expecting one, or they would stay safe at home. But you never can tell what old dog Spot is going to do. My father and his friends would be disappointed if I didn't come. They would be angry, too. And just as likely as not I'd be put to bed an hour before sunset. So I shall go home now, whether you give me leave or not."
"Then I'll give you leave--if that's the case," said Major Monkey. "I can't have anybody disobeying orders; so I'll give you leave. And I'll dismiss the army until to-morrow.... The last man over the fence will be shot at sunrise," he added. It seemed as if he was determined to shoot somebody, anyhow.
Well, everyone turned and ran like the wind. Naturally, nobody wanted to be last, after what Major Monkey had said.
It looked, for a few moments, as if the whole army was going to cross the fence at the same instant. But Billy Woodchuck was so unlucky as to step into a hole. He fell head over heels. And by the time he had picked himself up and reached the fence all the rest were safe on the other side of it.
Things looked very dark for Billy Woodchuck--especially when Major Monkey grinned horribly at him between the rails and said:
"Too bad, my boy! But this is war, you know.... Please don't forget the time! To-morrow, at sunrise!"
Billy Woodchuck's heart sank. He wished he had never joined the army. And then an idea came to him. It was such a simple one that it is a wonder he hadn't thought of it instantly. Instead of going over the fence, to everybody's surprise he squirmed under it. And everybody was vastly relieved. Even Major Monkey appeared to be delighted.
"I'm afraid"--he said with a smile--"I'm afraid we'll have to shoot the rest of the army