The Reflections of Ambrosine - A Novel | Page 8

ball! Oh! I should like to go to a ball. What could it feel like, I
wonder, to have on a white tulle dress and to dance all the evening.
Would grandmamma ever let me? Oh! it made my heart beat. But
suddenly a cold dash came--I could not go with a person like Mrs.
Gurrage. I would rather stay at home than that. When we got to the gate
I said good-bye and gave him two fingers, but he was not the least
daunted, and, seizing all my hand, said:
"Now, don't send me away; I want to come in and see your
grandmother."
There was nothing left for me to do, and he followed me into the house
and into the drawing-room.
Grandmamma was sitting as usual in her chair. She does not have to
fluster in, buttoning her cuff, when people call.
"Mr. Gurrage wishes to see you, grandmamma," I said, as I kissed her
hand, and then I left them to take off my hat and I did not come down
again until I heard the front door shut.
"That is a terrible young man, Ambrosine," grandmamma said, when I
did return to the drawing-room. "How could you encourage him to
walk back with you?"
"Indeed, grandmamma, I did not wish him to come; he did not even ask
my leave; he just walked beside me."
"Well, well," grandmamma said, and she raised my face in her hands. I
was sitting on a low stool so as to get the last of the light for my
embroidery. She pushed the hair back from my forehead--I wear it
brushed up like Ambrosine Eustasie de Calincourt--and she looked and
looked into my eyes. If possible there was something pained and
wistful in her face. "My beautiful Ambrosine," she said, and that was

all. I felt I was blushing all over my cheeks. "Beautiful Ambrosine."
Then it must be true if grandmamma said it. I had often thought
so--perhaps--myself, but I was not sure if other people might think so
too.
* * * * *
It is six weeks now since the Gurrages returned, and constantly, oh! but
constantly has that young man come across my path. I think I grow to
dislike him more as time goes on. He is so persistent and thick of ideas,
and he always does things in the wrong place. I feel afraid to go for my
walks, as he seems to be loitering about. I sneak out of the back door
and choose the most secluded lanes, but it does not matter; he somehow
turns up. Certainly three times a week do I have to put up with his
company in one way or another. It is a perfect insult to think of such a
person as an admirer, and I annihilated Hephzibah, who had the
impertinence to suggest such a thing to me when she was brushing my
hair a few days ago. The ball is coming off, but grandmamma has not
seemed very well lately. It is nothing much, just a bluish look round her
mouth, but I fear perhaps she will not be fit to go. When the invitation
came--brought down by Mrs. Gurrage in person--grandmamma said she
never allowed me to go out without herself, but she would be very
pleased to take me. I was perfectly thunderstruck when I heard her say
it. She--grandmamma--going out at night! It was so good of her, and
when I thanked her afterwards, all she said was, "I seldom do things
without a reason, Ambrosine."
Oh, the delight in getting my dress! We hired the fly from the Crown
and Sceptre and Hephzibah drove with me into Tilchester with a list of
things to get, written out by grandmamma--these were only the small
etceteras; the dress itself is to come from Paris! I was frightened almost
at the dreadful expense, but grandmamma would hear nothing from me.
"My granddaughter does not go to her first ball arrayed like a
provinciale," she told me. I do not know what it is to be, she did not
consult me, but I feel all jumping with excitement when I think of it.
Only four days more before the ball, and the box from Paris is coming
to-morrow.

The Gurrages are to have a large party--some cousins and friends. I am
sure they will not be interesting. They asked us to dine and go on with
them, but grandmamma said that would be too fatiguing for her, and we
are going straight from the cottage, I do not quite know what has
happened. A few days ago, after lunch, grandmamma had a kind of
fainting fit. It frightened me terribly, and the under-servant ran for the
doctor. She had revived when he came, and she sent