The Chimes | Page 9

say?' asked the Alderman, jocosely, of the red- faced gentleman in the
blue coat. 'You have heard friend Filer. What do YOU SAY?'
'What's it possible to say?' returned the gentleman. 'What IS to be said? Who can take any
interest in a fellow like this,' meaning Trotty; 'in such degenerate times as these? Look at
him. What an object! The good old times, the grand old times, the great old times!
THOSE were the times for a bold peasantry, and all that sort of thing. Those were the
times for every sort of thing, in fact. There's nothing now-a-days. Ah!' sighed the
red-faced gentleman. 'The good old times, the good old times!'
The gentleman didn't specify what particular times he alluded to; nor did he say whether
he objected to the present times, from a disinterested consciousness that they had done
nothing very remarkable in producing himself.

'The good old times, the good old times,' repeated the gentleman. 'What times they were!
They were the only times. It's of no use talking about any other times, or discussing what
the people are in THESE times. You don't call these, times, do you? I don't. Look into
Strutt's Costumes, and see what a Porter used to be, in any of the good old English
reigns.'
'He hadn't, in his very best circumstances, a shirt to his back, or a stocking to his foot; and
there was scarcely a vegetable in all England for him to put into his mouth,' said Mr. Filer.
'I can prove it, by tables.'
But still the red-faced gentleman extolled the good old times, the grand old times, the
great old times. No matter what anybody else said, he still went turning round and round
in one set form of words concerning them; as a poor squirrel turns and turns in its
revolving cage; touching the mechanism, and trick of which, it has probably quite as
distinct perceptions, as ever this red-faced gentleman had of his deceased Millennium.
It is possible that poor Trotty's faith in these very vague Old Times was not entirely
destroyed, for he felt vague enough at that moment. One thing, however, was plain to him,
in the midst of his distress; to wit, that however these gentlemen might differ in details,
his misgivings of that morning, and of many other mornings, were well founded. 'No, no.
We can't go right or do right,' thought Trotty in despair. 'There is no good in us. We are
born bad!'
But Trotty had a father's heart within him; which had somehow got into his breast in spite
of this decree; and he could not bear that Meg, in the blush of her brief joy, should have
her fortune read by these wise gentlemen. 'God help her,' thought poor Trotty. 'She will
know it soon enough.'
He anxiously signed, therefore, to the young smith, to take her away. But he was so busy,
talking to her softly at a little distance, that he only became conscious of this desire,
simultaneously with Alderman Cute. Now, the Alderman had not yet had his say, but HE
was a philosopher, too--practical, though! Oh, very practical--and, as he had no idea of
losing any portion of his audience, he cried 'Stop!'
'Now, you know,' said the Alderman, addressing his two friends, with a self-complacent
smile upon his face which was habitual to him, 'I am a plain man, and a practical man;
and I go to work in a plain practical way. That's my way. There is not the least mystery or
difficulty in dealing with this sort of people if you only understand 'em, and can talk to
'em in their own manner. Now, you Porter! Don't you ever tell me, or anybody else, my
friend, that you haven't always enough to eat, and of the best; because I know better. I
have tasted your tripe, you know, and you can't "chaff" me. You understand what "chaff"
means, eh? That's the right word, isn't it? Ha, ha, ha! Lord bless you,' said the Alderman,
turning to his friends again, 'it's the easiest thing on earth to deal with this sort of people,
if you understand 'em.'
Famous man for the common people, Alderman Cute! Never out of temper with them!
Easy, affable, joking, knowing gentleman!

'You see, my friend,' pursued the Alderman, 'there's a great deal of nonsense talked about
Want--"hard up," you know; that's the phrase, isn't it? ha! ha! ha!--and I intend to Put it
Down. There's a certain amount of cant in vogue about Starvation, and I mean to Put it
Down. That's all! Lord bless you,' said the Alderman, turning to his friends again, 'you
may Put Down anything among this sort of people, if you only know the way to set about
it.'
Trotty took