Love Conquers All | Page 9

proceed to the next step.

Have some one of your friends bring you a chair, a table and an old
pyrography outfit, together with some book-ends on which to burn a
design.
Seat yourself at the table in the chair and (if I remember the process
correctly) squeeze the bulb attached to the needle until the latter
becomes red hot. Then, grasping the book-ends in the left hand,
carefully trace around the pencilled design with the point of the needle.
It probably will be a picture of the Lion of Lucerne, and you will let the
needle slip on the way round the face, giving it the appearance of
having shaved in a Pullman that morning. But that really won't make
any difference, for the whole thing is not so much to do a nice pair of
book-ends as to help you along in watching the chess-match.
If you have any scruples against burning wood, you may knit
something, or paste stamps in an album.
And before you know it, the game will be over and you can put on your
things and go home.

VII
WATCHING BASEBALL
D.A.C. NEWS
Eighteen men play a game of baseball and eighteen thousand watch
them, and yet those who play are the only ones who have any official
direction in the matter of rules and regulations. The eighteen thousand
are allowed to run wild. They don't have even a Spalding's Guide
containing group photographs of model organizations of fans in Fall
River, Mass., or the Junior Rooters of Lyons, Nebraska. Whatever
course of behavior a fan follows at a game he makes up for himself.
This is, of course, ridiculous.
The first set of official rulings for spectators at baseball games has been
formulated and is herewith reproduced. It is to be hoped that in the

general cleanup which the game is undergoing, the grandstand and
bleachers will not resent a little dictation from the authorities.
In the first place, there is the question of shouting encouragement, or
otherwise, at the players. There must be no more random screaming. It
is of course understood that the players are entirely dependent on the
advice offered them from the stands for their actions in the game, and
how is a batter to know what to do if, for instance, he hears a little man
in the bleachers shouting, "Wait for 'em, Wally! Wait for 'em," and
another little man in the south stand shouting "Take a crack at the first
one, Wally!"? What would you do? What would Lincoln have done?
The official advisers in the stands must work together. They must
remember that as the batter advances toward the plate he is listening for
them to give him his instructions, and if he hears conflicting advice
there is no telling what he may do. He may even have to decide for
himself.
Therefore, before each player goes to bat, there should be a conference
among the fans who have ideas on what his course of action should be,
and as soon as a majority have come to a decision, the advice should be
shouted to the player in unison under the direction of a cheer-leader. If
there are any dissenting opinions, they may be expressed in a minority
report.
In the matter of hostile remarks addressed at an unpopular player on the
visiting team, it would probably be better to leave the wording entirely
to the individual fans. Each man has his own talents in this sort of thing
and should be allowed to develop them along natural lines. In such
crises as these in which it becomes necessary to rattle the opposing
pitcher or prevent the visiting catcher from getting a difficult foul, all
considerations of good sportsmanship should be discarded. As a matter
of fact, it is doubtful if good sportsmanship should ever be allowed to
interfere with the fan's participation in a contest. The game must be
kept free from all softening influences.
One of the chief duties of the fan is to engage in arguments with the
man behind him. This department of the game has been allowed to run

down fearfully. A great many men go to a ball game today and never
speak a word to anyone other than the members of their own party or
an occasional word of cheer to a player. This is nothing short of craven.
An ardent supporter of the home-team should go to a game prepared to
take offense, no matter what happens. He should be equipped with a
stock of ready sallies which can be used regardless of what the
argument is about or what has gone before in the exchange of words.
Among the more popular nuggets of repartee, effective on all occasions,
are the following:
"Oh, is that so?"
"Eah?"
"How