A Man of Samples | Page 8

permit him to feel very desirous of his competitor's company.
After registering at the hotel it occurred to me that it would be a good
idea to catch any of the dealers that I could that evening and break the
ice. It might be worth something to make a good impression before

Blissam got around. After getting my bearings well established, I
started to call on Billwock.
Billwock was pretty generally known in the gun trade; first for being
mighty slow pay, and second for the fact that they had a baby at his
shop regularly every year or oftener, and the store was used as nursery
and play-ground. Traveling men had to see the last baby and count all
the old ones, and according as they praised them did old Billwock buy
liberally or not.
The head of the house had said to me, "Don't push goods on Billwock;
he owes us enough already. If you squeeze a good payment out of him
you can sell him a small bill."
This kind of talk is all good enough, so far as it goes; but the poor devil
on the road often finds he can't get a cent, neither can he sell any goods.
The men at home think all he need do is to say, "Here I am; what is it
you want?" and then copy the order as fast as he can write. But the men
who order that way are the kind who never intend to pay for what they
order.
I thought the matter of Billwock's account all over by the time I found
his store. It was dimly lighted, but I saw a man and woman at the rear,
and went in. A mussy and dirty looking man came forward to meet me,
but when he had walked a little way he evidently concluded that I was a
drummer, and that I might walk the rest of the way to him.
"Is this Mr. Billwock?" I asked.
"Yes."
I told him who I was, but he seemed little interested. I started to ask
about his business, but some one sang out my name and said, "Don't go
talking business out there; come back and see the baby."
Blissam, by thunder!
I went back and found him beside Mrs. Billwock, with a young one on

his knee, and as much at home as if he was the uncle of all concerned. I
made up my mind that Blissam couldn't be any more sociable than I
could, and I set out to do my prettiest.
About 9 o'clock we both went out together, and, perhaps naturally,
drifted to the smoking room of his hotel. He was an old hand on the
road, and full of stories of his own and others' experience. I tried to be a
good listener.
"There are some mighty queer men in the trade," said he, as he puffed
his cigar. "I took an order from a man in Indiana, not long ago, for felt
wads, Nos. 8 and 9, and for some cardboard. When I went to copy my
orders I remembered that the man had given no size for the cardboard
wanted, but I was pretty sure he wanted 12's, and wrote that size. As it
happened the house was out of No. 9 felt and let it go, as he only
wanted one-third of a dozen. What did the fellow do but send back the
card-board wads, saying he had ordered 9's, and giving us Hail
Columbia for sending 12's instead, as well as a long epistle about
knowing his own business, and not wanting our help in running it. The
card-board wads were worth about 33 cents, and the express charges on
them back were 25 cents. I tell you the world is full of smart Alecks."
"I presume I have seen more about returned goods than you have," I
said, "as I have been in the store so long, and see every package that
comes in. I do get my back up over some of the stupid things the
average retailer will do. It never seems to enter his head to drop the
house a card and await their instructions about the goods that are
unsatisfactory, but he fancies he is showing how smart he is by
whacking them back at once, and always by express, no matter how
heavy the goods are. A neighbor of mine, a hardware man, told me an
instance of the smart Aleck a few days ago. The house was handling a
new tubular lantern and selling it under the market price of regular
goods. The traveling man sent in three orders from a Michigan town,
each of them for one-half dozen lanterns. The stock clerk had a single
half dozen of the new lantern