Punch, or The London Charivari

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愦Punch, Or The London Charivari, Vol. 101. July 4, 1891

The Project Gutenberg EBook of Punch, Or The London Charivari, Vol. 101.
July 4, 1891, by Various This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net
Title: Punch, Or The London Charivari, Vol. 101. July 4, 1891
Author: Various
Release Date: September 30, 2004 [EBook #13563]
Language: English
Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
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PUNCH,
OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
VOL. 101.

July 4, 1891.

[Illustration]
* * * * *
URBI ET ORBI.
Mr. PUNCH returns thanks for the anticipatory congratulations on the occasion of his Jubilee, and takes this opportunity of informing his friends--which means Everybody Everywhere--that the 50th anniversary of his natal day is July 18 _prox._, which day Mr. PUNCH hereby gives full and entire permission to the aforesaid Everyone Everywhere to keep as a whole Holiday, and do in a general way, and to the utmost of their ability, just exactly what best pleases them.
PUNCH.
* * * * *
THE CHANTREY BEQUEST à LA MODE DE LISLE.
["Mr. DE LISLE wished the Government to veto any pictures purchased under the Chantrey Bequest that did not meet with their approval."--_Daily Paper._]
SCENE--_A Studio in the Royal Academy. The_ President and several Members of the Council _waiting arrival of Government to inspect their most recent purchase._
President (_with assumed joviality_). Well, my dear Colleagues, I do not think exception can be taken to this composition. Simple and effective, is it not?
First Member of Council (_gloomily_). Oh, you never know! I think we ought to have opposed the admission of the Cabinet--what should they know about Art?
Second Mem. (_drily_). Enough to make speeches at the annual dinner--to which they wouldn't come if we snubbed them.
First Mem. What of that? I am sure the President is quite eloquent enough to stand alone.
Pres. (_with a graceful bow_). You are most kind. But, hush! here comes Lord SALISBURY!
Enter the PRIME MINISTER. _Cordial greetings._
Premier (_briskly_). I am sure you will forgive me if I get through this quickly. (_Looking at picture._) Hm! Yes, very nice; but did EDWARD the Black Prince wear his Garter ribbon in battle? I am sure I refrain from appearing in mine under similar circumstances. (To Pres.) Do you think the Artist could paint it out?
Pres. I feel sure he will do everything in his power to satisfy your Lordship's artistic instincts.
Premier. Just so.
[Exit R. when enter FIRST LORD of the TREASURY, L.
Pres. (_greeting new-comer cordially_). Most glad to see you, my dear Right Hon. Sir!
First Lord. Very good indeed of you to say so, but am always anxious to do my duty to my Queen and Country. (_Gazing at picture._) Hm! Not bad! But, I say, I do know something of yachting, and that isn't the way to brace up the marling-spike to the fokesell yard with the main jibboom three points in a wind with some East in it! If I may venture a suggestion--hope Artist will paint out the gondola. Ta-ta! A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. [_Exit._
Pres. Well, well, I do not know what our friend will think of the matter, but perhaps the Hansom of Venice is a little superfluous. Why here is the HOME SECRETARY.
[_Enter that august personage--mutual greeting._
Home Sec. (_examining picture_). Yes, very nice. Just my idea of what a historical picture should be! Sea-view very fair indeed, and I think that the suggestion of the presentation at Court is also extremely neat. The Black Prince, perhaps, a little near OLIVER CROMWELL, but then that is a detail that will not challenge particular attention. I like too the view of Vauxhall Gardens--very good, indeed! But why should a scene of this great historical importance be laid in Charing Cross during a labour demonstration?
Pres. (_frankly_). I cannot say that I have looked up all my authorities, but I do not think our friend would allow himself to be wrong on so important a point.
Home Sec. Well, I think it would be in better taste if the Artist cut out that stampede of police--it is not true to nature! [_Exit._
Pres. There may be something in what he says, but I do wish these amateurs would keep their suggestions to themselves.
Enter FIRST LORD of the ADMIRALTY.
Pres. (_cordially_). My dear Lord, delighted to see you--what do you think of it?
First Lord. Hm! Yes! Perhaps! But, I say, what right has the Artist to put the white ensign on the top of that light-house? It's against the regulations--they should be flying the Trinity House flag--if anything. That must come out, you know--it really must! [_Exit._
Pres. Silly
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