Heart

Martin Farquhar Tupper
Heart, by Martin Farquhar
Tupper

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Title: Heart A Social Novel
Author: Martin Farquhar Tupper

Release Date: December 31, 2006 [eBook #20235]
Language: English
Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1
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HEART;

A Social Novel.
by
MARTIN FARQUHAR TUPPER, A.M., F.R.S.
Author of Proverbial Philosophy.

Hartford: Published by Silas Andrus & Son. 1851.

HEART.
CHAPTER I.
WHEREIN TWO ANXIOUS PARENTS HOLD A COLLOQUY.
"Is he rich, ma'am? is he rich? ey? what--what? is he rich?"
Sir Thomas was a rapid little man, and quite an epicure in the use of
that luscious monosyllable.
"Is he rich, Lady Dillaway? ey? what?"
"Really, Thomas, you never give me time to answer," replied the
quintescence of quietude, her ladyship; "and then it is perpetually the
same question, and--"
"Well, ma'am, can there be a more important question asked? I repeat it,
is he rich? ey? what?
"You know, Sir Thomas, we never are agreed about the meaning of that
word; but I should say, very."
As Lady Dillaway always spoke quite softly in a whisper, she had
failed to enlighten the knight; but he seemed, notwithstanding, to have
caught her intention instinctively; for he added, in his impetuous,

imperious way,
"No nonsense now, about talents and virtues, and all such trash; but
quick, ma'am, quick--is the man rich?"
"In talents, as you mention the word, certainly, very rich; a more clever
or accomplished--"
"Cut it short, ma'am--cut it short, I say--I'll have no adventurers, who
live by their wits, making up to my daughter--pedantic puppies, good
for ushers, nothing else. What do they mean by knowing so much? ey?
what?"
"And then, Sir Thomas, if you will only let me speak, a man of purer
morals, finer feelings, higher Christian--"
"Bah! well enough for curates: go on, ma'am--go on, and make haste to
the point of all points--is he rich?"
"You know I never will make haste, Thomas, for I never can have
patience, and you shall hear; I am little in the habit of judging people
entirely by their purses, not even a son-in-law, provided there is a
sufficiency on the one side or the other for--"
"Quick, mum--quick--rich--rich? will the woman drive me mad?" and
Sir Thomas Dillaway, Knight, rattled loose cash in both pockets more
vindictively than ever. But the spouse, nothing hurried, still crept on in
her sotto voce adantino style,
"Mr. Clements owes nothing, has something, and above and beside all
his good heart, good mind, good fame, good looks, good family,
possesses a contented--"
"Pish! contented, bah!" our hasty knight's nose actually curled upwards
in utter scorn as he added, "Now, that's enough--quite enough. I'll bet a
plum the man's poor. Contented indeed! did you ever know a rich man
yet who was contented--ey? mum--ey? or a poor one that wasn't--ey?
what? I've no patience with those contented fellows: it's my belief they

steal away the happiness of monied men. If this Mr. Clements was
rich--rich, one wouldn't mind so much about talents, virtues, and
contentment--work-house blessings; but the man's poor, I know
it--poo-o-or!"
Sir Thomas had a method quite his own of pronouncing those
contradictory monosyllables, rich and poor: the former he gave out
with an unctuous, fish-saucy gusto, and the word seemed to linger on
his palate as a delicious morsel in the progress of delightful deglutition;
but when he uttered the word poor, it was with that "mewling and
puking" miserable face, appropriated from time immemorial to the
gulping of a black draught.
"No, Lady Dillaway, right about's the next word I shall say to that
smooth-looking pauper, Mr. Henry Clements--to think of his
impudence, making up to my daughter, indeed! a poo-o-o-r man, too."
"I did not tell you he was poor, Sir Thomas: you have run away with
that idea on your own account: the young man has enough for the
present, owes nothing for the past, and reasonable expectations for the--
"Future, I suppose, ey? what? I hate futures, all the lot of 'em: cash
down, ready money, bird in the hand, that's my ticket, mum:
expectations, indeed! Well, go on--go on; I'm as patient as a--as a mule,
you see; go on, will you; I may as well hear it all out, Lady Dillaway."
"Well, Sir Thomas, since you think so little of the future, I will not
insist on expectations; though I really can
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